Team India: Captaincy and Season preview

IPL is close to getting over and this is a good time to start thinking about the one team that really matters: The Indian Cricket Team.

Team needs changes and it must start at the top. No one should have any doubts about Dhoni's credentials as a captain; he is one of the greatest we have ever seen. Not a great tactician by any means, probably his greatest strength was not allowing success or failure get to his head in these times of intense media scrutiny. But no one can be or should be a captain forever. Starting from Ganguly's reign in the aftermath of matchfixing controversy, we have been lucky to have great captains who were just the right guys to lead the team during their respective eras. There are strong indications that Dhoni is no more the best guy to lead us. He carries a jaded look on tours these days. His body has been bruised, his mind routinely overclocked. One of the biggest reasons for our recent overseas loses was the lack of leadership. Back home Dhoni is way more relaxed and back in his elements. He would do well to step down at this time and focus on his role as a wicket keeper batsman. For the next World Cup, we need our best finisher ever to be in top shape. Dhoni should also work harder on reinventing himself as a test batsman, something he might be able to do once relieved of the burden of captaincy.

The choice for our next captain was always obvious; IPL has now made it a no-brainer. Gautam Gambhir has been a revelation. He relishes captaincy and is a certainty for India in all 3 formats of the game. He has the right mix of patience and aggression, a big match temperament, always backs and supports his players. Virat Kohli should continue to be his deputy.

A few other things on my wishlist for the next one year:

Che Pujara and Rahane should cement a place in the test squad.

Umesh Yadav to lead the pace attack in all 3 forms, Zaheer Khan's fitness can't be relied upon.

A closure on Rohit Sharma's case (whether he really has the temperament to play for India). He is that guy whom everyone wants to love but he keeps giving reasons to hate him.

Sachin Tendulkar deserves to get picked in the team as long as he continues to be in form. One thing that we can't allow him to do is to skip every other tour. Cricketers do need rest, and its fine to opt out of the occasional tours. But playing around 30 - 40 percent of the games hurts stability and balance of the team.

And before we go, a prediction for tonight's game, KKR will win this. They have been the best team of the competition despite finishing second in the table. I know Srini uncle might be trying everything in his power but if needed, trust 'The Don SRK' to pull off another incredible heist and do a double whammy on Srini uncle by buying some Chennai players and turning them against their own boss.

- rajesh@cricketbakchod.com 

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Of Haters and Luck

This one might sting a few. If you are not a general hater, continue reading. If you are a hater, then you are warned before you read further. CSK were lucky to reach the playoffs – Agreed!. And they are lucky since Dhoni is lucky. And since Dhoni is lucky, you hate him. Well, I am not a huge Dhoni fan but I forgive him a hundred sins for giving me the best night of my life after winning the World Cup (4-0 loses against England and Australia in the test matches were two of those sins). But I am writing this since I generally hate the haters of any kind. So here are some quick explanations to your useless Brain farts. By the end of this, I hope you should be able to know a bit more about your worthless self.

Haters: DHONI IS JUST A LUCKY BASTARD...

CricketBakchod: Okay. This might be long.. You know what? Fuck You! And you know who else is a Lucky bastard? You are. For you were born worthless and never acquired any real skills. You somehow managed to land up a job in a company which trained you to do some shit. Despite being worthless, you can buy yourself a computer and a smartphone and an internet connection to read this blog. Yes, you are the lucky bastard for not ending up like a homeless bum which you might fully deserve to be. But lets come to the point, this is not about you. Probably, some people in sports like in life are luckier than others. But most of them still end up being a loser like you. Some, however smash 51 of 20 balls when lady luck presents a chance to them. Some of them manage to keep their head and back themselves despite going through a series of loses and setbacks. And some, walk in with the World Cup in balance and own them bitches. Yes, luck is important. But what's more important is to make it count. And Dhoni, unlike most of you has been able to make it count almost everytime.

Haters: DHONI HAS NO GRACE WHILE BATTING. DAMN! HE CAN'T EVEN HIT A COVER DRIVE...

CricketBakchod: Here is a good exercise for you. Take the MCC coaching manual, yes the one with that hard cover. And shove it up your ass. You know why? Let me explain. You get 4 runs for a graceful cover drive where you hold that pose with that nice straight bat. You also get 4 runs for that shovel which Dhoni plays with an angular bat off the front foot through the off side. "Runs on the board." Say that out loud to yourself. Yes runs on the board are what wins you game. And in case no one has told this to you yet, there is only one reason to play sport. To Win. To play fair, and win. All that matters. End of Story.

Haters: DHONI'S RISE HAS BEEN SO QUICK. HE DOESN'T DESERVE TO BE WHERE HE IS..

CricketBakchod: Okay, only fucktards among elitist haters will say this. I have my sympathies with you. You might be an extreme case and I will try not to abuse you (Damn! Sorry, for the first line). You suffer from a syndrome called "Fuck him, he-successful-but-me-Loser". Yes, that's a medical term. You may not know it but you only hate the rise of people who are similar to you. Those who had a very humble upbringing, and very little to no means, but could still rise above the system and somehow make it big. But you are still right there in your miserable life. As I said, my sympathies. Resident medical team of CricketBakchod highly recommends that you wank yourself at least 2 times daily to feel better about yourself.

Well, to my mind these are the most popular among the Dhoni hate rants. There may be others but I don't have the time and energy to cover them all. Haters deserve only so much of my time.

PS: This blog is written under the assumption that IPL is not scripted.

 - rajesh@cricketbakchod.com

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Ganguly Vs Dada

Pune vs Mumbai, the Maharashtra Derby. Sachin vs Saurav. Ambani vs Sahara. As is usual in the IPL, this was a game of many head to heads.

This is Dada at the toss: (Source: Cricinfo match commentary)

"The pitch looks good, the ball comes on to the bat and 160-170 is achievable."

This is Dada in the post match presentation: (Source: Cricinfo match commentary)

"This was not an easy wicket, the ball did not come on to the bat. We lost a few wickets early, when I got out was the turning point of the game."

Forget about the game, Dada's credibility for his future commentary stints took a nosedive. I was pretty sure that Harbhajan and Dada had entered an agreement before the game to criticize the pitch as the only face saving way to explain their inept batting performances. From the evidences on TV, I didn't see one ball keep alarmingly low or move in the air or turn sharply. Batting of Mithun Manhas and Bhuwanesh Kumar proved beyond doubt that this was more about batting ineptitude than just a bad pitch.

Ganguly's attitude is a tale of two eras. That of before and after the Chappell fall out. Or, as I like to say it, the pre and post Dadagiri era. Ganguly in the pre-Dadagiri era was still a hard nosed cookie. There have been rumors of him refusing to be the twelfth man or carry drinks right from him junior/under-16 days. Later on, he popularly earned the sobriquet of "Lord Snooty" from Freddie Flintoff when the two shared the dressing room for Lancashire. But that was more of a cultural mix up than anything else (much like the Shilpa Shetty episode on The Big Brother).

After getting dropped from the Indian team (deservingly so), in came the Dadagiri era. (Did it coincide with what is called the attitude era in WWE wresting? okay lets leave that). It was my way or highway from here on. Dada realized his Bengal power and a certain CPI party member even raised a question in the parliament about Ganguly's place in the team. After the comeback, Ganguly would continue to have a good batting average but unsurprisingly winning fewer and fewer matches since he would be mostly content to just keep his place in the side. Before all the Bengalis start shouting, I do remember some of his important test innings from this period. His innings in South Africa, His double hundred against Pakistan and the one he played again against South Africa on a rank turner in Kanpur. But these were not innings where he had to make a self vs team choice. His divisive influence in the 2007 world cup was apparent when despite being a senior player he was content on just doing enough with the bat to retain his place. In that disastrous match against Bangladesh his slow batting (66 of 129 balls) was mostly responsible for India's low total and eventual defeat (probably he had realized that we being a stat obsessed nation can't blame the highest scorer of the game for losing that match http://www.espncricinfo.com/wc2007/engine/current/match/247464.html)

His real Dadagiri came to the fore in dressing rooms where he was not made the captain. From Team India to Team KKR, if you don't make Dada the captain, you can't hope to have a cohesive team. Making Dada the captain of Pune Warriors mitigates this issue but his attitude of him being beyond questioning still remains, and despite showing some initial form looks bound to eventually keep Pune Warriors out of the playoffs race.

Today as I wait for the Dada homecoming match at the Edens, I hope that he for once can just be Ganguly. Pune tonight just want Dada to be their inspirational leader on the field. He still has the natural stroke playing instincts left in him. He can be a floater or a lower order batsman who can just express himself with his shot making. Here's hoping for the victory of a cricketing brain over the political brain.

Sincerely.

A Saurav Ganguly fan.

- rajesh@cricketbakchod.com

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